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I decided to be upfront about being widowed so put it on my profile, being clear to mention that it didn’t define me.It was, after all, the reason I was on a dating app and in many ways, it’s a lot more straightforward: there is no ex, I’m clearly not still married and while sad, my situation is actually a lot less complicated than a lot of people’s.Being judged by a picture (and judging others on theirs), was new, too: I hadn’t even liked my husband when I first met him but as we got to know each other we just clicked.In this new dating world, I probably wouldn’t have even swiped right on my husband.

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One guy ended things after a few dates with a text that read: ‘I don’t want to be the one to break your heart’, which struck me as particularly arrogant.

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I would get up, fix a smile on my face and go out knowing that when I came home there would be no one to talk to about my day.

Eventually we began to carve out our new normal but one evening I found myself on my own in the house with just the dog for company, thinking: ‘Is this as good as it gets?

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