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This undermines her authority and also confuses the children as to which one of you they should be listening to.Neither preach to them nor bore them to death with "when I was your age" stories. Trust takes time to build and children are no exception to this rule.Long before they start to envision you as a permanent fixture, they need to observe your actions and see how you relate to them as individuals and not just attachments to their mother.They need to get comfortable with the fact that she's not going to bring someone into their lives who will do them harm or ship them off to a boarding school in Brazil.They also need to appreciate that the inclusion of a new male figure in their lifestyle doesn't diminish the importance of their real dad.

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